Isaiah 58:9a
“Then you will call, and the Lord will
answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here I am.”
God I am calling out to you right now.
It’s been a rough night. At 117 am we got a knock on our door and a request to
assist in surgery down at the hospital. Mama was eclampic and we needed to
assist with an emergency c/s. Allison, Erin, and I gathered all of our
equipment and briskly walked down to the hospital, meanwhile avoiding an branch
that had a similar appearance as a snake. Upon arrival, we scrubbed in and made
ourselves useful. Update from the surgeons revealed mama as eclamptic, BP in
the 240’s and she also had a seizure. The seizure caused her to bite her tongue
and she was having difficulty breathing because we have no artificial airways
at our fingertips Surgery had already began, and Allison and Erin were on baby
duty. I was there to do as requested and to have an extra pair of hands. Soon
after, a hand poked out, followed by meconium fluid. The surgeons quickly
removed the baby from the mother’s uterus, clamped and cut the cord, and passed
over the baby to the girls.
I lost my breath as I saw the newborn.
The room was silent except for clinking of surgical tools. … No breath of
life….. but silence. The baby’s lungs were not working. There were no screaming
gasps of fresh air. The girls had already began rescusitation, suction…
meconium…moer suction… more meconium…. Suction…suction…suction. Erin reached
for the suction machine instead of the bulb syringe, but there was no cord. Yet
again, we are in a resource limited environment. They continued working at a
quick pace, compressions and breaths, use of the oxygen mask. Only a matter of
about 15 seconds had passed. I returned my mind to the operating table and Miss
Pattie had me assisting her as scrub tech. I had suction in one hand, then a
hemostat, surgical scissors… and so forth. I was getting a lesson in tech instruments
while assisting in surgery. Miss Pattie is a great teacher and she always has
the right equipment prepared before the surgeon requests it. Dr. Black and Dr.
Brantley worked on the woman and closed her up. And time was clicking away…
Tick….
Tock…
Tick…
Tock…
Clink….
Tick…
Tock…
Still no screaming baby. And time
continued on. Heartrate dropping…. Breathing on its own only once every 20-30
seconds. They continued assisting the
baby with resuscitation. Its hands and legs lay limp on the table…extremities
purplish/blue… still not pink even with stimulation.
--------------------45 minutes
later----------------------
Mama is closed up and being wheeled
back to OB. Dr. Snell, Allison, and Erin are still being troopers and working
on little one, switching off jobs to maintain optimum strength. Still….baby is
not doing good. And then you hear a voice, sometimes you have to stop, I think
its time.
The oxygen machine was turned off,
little one was wrapped up tighter, placed in the basinet and wheeled to OB. We
all shed our OR clothes and continued the work in OB. Oxygen was put back on
little one, he was wrapped up in two more blankets, and we continued to monitor
him.
All the while, another woman goes into
labor.
As the night progressed, little one did
not make it. His heart ceased to beat and he died in the four o clock hour. He went
to heaven to be with his Daddy, to be free from pain and suffering, to be free
from the cares of this world, and to be free from the grasp of Satan.
As I lay in bed, wide awake, I feel
numb. I don’t know what to feel right now. Reality has not sunk in. One thing I
do know is that Jesus is my light in the darkness, and I am not alone.
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